Foster to Adopt

Back in 2004 Rob and Jennifer became foster parents.  The goal never was to adopt, even though Rob was adopted as an infant.  The Talbot goal was to reunify kids to their families.  The way it worked out was the size of our family doubled!  Sometimes things work out different than you plan.

Heather and boys 2013

Heather with boys L-R Tommy, Charlie, Matthew 2013

First came Heather as a fifteen year old.  She was about as easy as they come for foster kids.  She was and is extremely self-sufficient, intelligent and caring.  We met Heather at church where Jennifer was her youth pastor.  Life for Heather was a lot of moving and different people in her life.  A tragedy struck her family and Heather asked the family court judge to let her see what it would be like to live in a different home than her biological family.

About a year later Tommy and Matthew came as active toddlers ages one and three.  Tommy made sure his little brother had food at the table and watched out for him even though Matthew was already as big as his older brother.  Both boys suffer from different characteristics of Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.  They suffer the consequences of a mother who didn’t know better and grew up bouncing around the foster care system herself.

Then Charlie came about a year later at the age of one.  He is Tommy and Matthew’s younger half-brother by the same mom.  Charlie had been in a wonderful foster home with an elderly couple who doted over him and did a wonderful job bonding and setting him on a great life course.  Charlie always came to the visits with the boys’ mom so we got to know him and his foster parents before he joined his brothers at our house.

We spent 15 months working on reunification with their 22 year old mother, but she just didn’t have the skills or capacity to raise them.  They were almost more than we could handle in our home and we believed if we didn’t adopt them, the boys would end up bouncing family to family through the system and eventually being separated.  We knew we had them figured out as well as anyone would and we had the ability to have Jennifer make her ministry be raising our kids.

So when we got the court date for the adoption of the boys we asked Heather (then 18 years old) if she’d like to join the Talbot family and she finally accepted.

Adoption Day September 2007.  Daniel in stripes, Holly in Red Sweater

Adoption Day September 2007. Daniel in stripes, Holly Red Sweater

In September 2007 all four of these special people became Talbots and joined Daniel and Holly as Talbot kids.

The adventure has been non stop and often more challenging and difficult than we wished.  We wonder what adolescents holds for our three boys.

In 2015 not only will we start this digital journey, but Daniel graduates from high school and starts college, Heather will get married and Jennifer and Rob will celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary.  It will be a great year!

In our digital presence Jennifer and Rob will share the adventures of the Talbot family.  We want to give you some things we have learned  and things we are learning as the kids grow up in a weekly blog.  The second part will be providing interactive training modules on different relationship subjects that are close to our hearts and activities.

Some training modules might include

  • What they told you but you didn’t believe about adopting foster kids  (in process now)
  • Foster parenting: is it for you?
  • Adoption: is it for you?
  • Advocating for special needs children in the public schools
  • How Fetal Alcohol Syndrome impacts our family daily
  • Teaching self sufficiency when you want to be helicopter parents (in process now)
  • Self harm and how to handle it
  • Parenting Talbot style
  • Grand parenting Foster and adopted children
  • Grandparents called back to parent their grandchildren
  • Biological families adopted children
  • Attachment disorders and living in a new family: options and ideas
  • Millennials and how they roll  (in process now)
  • Supervising Millennials (in process now)
  • International adoptions and how it all works
  • So you want to adopt… what type of adoption is best for you?

If any of these modules appeal to you  or if you have a question about any of these or related topics please send us a message and we will be glad to give you our perspective.

So please follow our blog (click down below on the page) and as these training modules come out we will invite you to join.